Tuesday, March 4, 2008

i'm teaching myself to believe in the things i don't understand

Lately I've been having several dreams with the general reoccuring theme of work (boring). and shoes.
together.
in the same dream.
frequently.
It's not a reoccuring dream.
It's different every time. But always, work and shoes.
I don't know what this means.
It totally confuses me.
Perhaps it means i should purchase some new shoes.
Purple ones. (I actually don't remember the shoes in all my dreams).
But I want purple ones. So i might just tell myself that it's increidbly important to my subconscious/for my pyschological well being that I go buy some. Like yesterday already.
In one dream i had to take off my shoes at work. Everyone did. And then I think they all got mixed up. and confusing?
In another I was working at ex-place of work, which was disapproving of my hair. And I was wearing totally the wrong shoes (ie. not black closed toe flats). In fact I was wearing two different shoes. I think one was yellow and one was green? I may be making this up. Who knows. it's not important. And it's not like you'll tell me I'm wrong.
It was kinda like my current workplace squished into the building of my old work.
And I might have started freaking out. And had to get someone to cover for me while I ran out on my lunch break? to buy some proper shoes. I recall buying them from Kmart or Big W or something similar.
Upon my return, I had some black peeptoe slingbacks. Also not the right kinda shoe.
It was all hugely problematic in my dream. But i like peeptoes. So I was probably happy.
The dreams started around the time my work was undergoing a management changeover. So it's probably got something to do with that.
I enjoy over analysing. So I will probably also say that it has something to do with worrying about not being able to live up to expectation (fill in your own shoes?). Other stuff. too. Probably. If i think too much. Which I really shouldn't do. It's too early.

I've noticed the past month or so I've actually been remembering my dreams. Half of them come out of nowhere. Does anyone dream about completely made up people? hybrids of people you actually know? Have music you actually like, stuck on a loop, as the psychotic soundtrack to your nightmare/sleep paralysis?

Sleep is weird. It's probably wasted on me, considering my body enjoys waking up at odd hours and not wanting to go back to sleep again. \
But I like the dreams.
And being confused about them.
And worrying about them.
And wondering if I should tell my friends I dreamt about making out with them (not at work).

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